Rated 'PG'

By: Jana~

*****~*****

--Richard Karinsky hated this time of year. Everyone was far too chipper and it interfered with his 'doom and gloom' outlook on life. Caroline Duffy on the other hand loved this time of year. With an almost childlike innocence she looked forward to the festivities and traditions of the holiday season. They were like oil and water on so many levels, this was just one more thing they didn't agree on.

--As Richard entered Caroline's apartment hhe was assaulted by the sights, sounds, and smells of the holidays. Caroline was obviously baking something with vanilla in it; he could smell it before he even entered the loft. She was quietly singing Christmas carols as she decorated the already overly decorated tree, and the whole apartment looked like something out of a department store window. Richard just stood quietly, stealing the chance to watch her before she realized he was there…

"Hey! There you are!" Caroline announced cheerfully as she spotted Richard out of her peripheral vision… "You're late!"

"Yeah, well, sorry…" he apologized as he hung up his coat… "I couldn't get a cab! Then I had to dodge all the 'MERRY' people as I WALKED here in the FREEZING cold!"

"Yeah, yeah… Bah Humbug to you too!" was her snide reply, quickly dismissing his negativity… "So, what do you think?" she asked, gesturing towards the holiday decorations.

"Well, if you must know, I think it looks like Santa Claus threw up in here."

She shook her head… "Well, Ho-Ho-Ho to you, too!"

"Look, can we just get to work please? I don't want to work overtime tonight."

"Why?"

"I just want to go home and freeze to death in my roach-infested, unheated apartment. Away from all this… mirth and merriment."

"Fine Richard… fine. I don't know what you have against Christmas anyway. Everyone loves Christmas."

"Not true. That's why the suicide rate is highest during this time of year."

"Sheeesh! You're gloomier than usual. What's wrong with you?"

"Nothing, Caroline. Can't you just accept the fact that some people don't like this time of year?"

"Yeah, I can accept that… but there is usually a reason. What's yours?"

"Caroline…" His whiny tone was part scolding, part pleading…

"You know, I'm not going to stop asking till you tell me. You might as well just spill it."

"If I tell you, can we get some work done?" he asked with exasperation…

She sat taller, triumphantly… "Yes!"

"Fine." He sighed… "You know what kind of childhood I had… well, it was worse at Christmas time, believe it or not. Most times my parents didn't even remember Christmas. The holidays were not a cheery time with friends and family, they were a nightmare." He ran his hand through his hair, then picked up a panel to be colored… "NOW can we get some work done?"

--Caroline could feel the familiar stingg oof tears as they filled her eyes. She watched as he threw himself into his work… he seemed so sad. She wanted to comfort him, but Richard didn't respond favorably to Caroline's emotional side, so she resisted the urge. She sat quietly and worked, stealing glances as she did.

--Richard could tell something was wrong, it wasn't like Caroline to be so quiet…

"You alright?" he asked distantly, trying to sound somewhat detached…

"Yeah. Why?"

"You're just quiet is all."

"Usually you're complaint is that I talk too much. I would think you'd be happy that I wasn't talking."

He shrugged… "Well, I am. But it's still uncharacteristic of you."

"Well, I know you don't want to hear what I have to say."

"Ok, fine. Let's just work then." Richard knew time would get the better of her. That eventually she would have to say what was on her mind. He was right, and it didn't take long…

She slammed the pencil down… "Can I just say one thing?"

"Like I can stop you."

"Ok, well... so, your childhood sucked. Christmas sucked. But, don't you think it's time to maybe… I don't know… make some good memories for the holidays? Like with friends and family?"

He dismissed her idea quickly… "Caroline… I don't keep in touch with my family, and I don't have any friends."

"Oh, well, thanks a lot!" Her tone showed just how hurt she was by the comment…

He caught the emotion in her voice and sighed… "You know what I meant."

"Well, there's some truth to it too, Richard! I have tried to be your friend and you just keep pushing me away!"

"I don't do it on purpose… it's just-- it's who I am."

"I know, I know. I just-- I would just like for once to see you happy!"

"I can't change who I am."

"And I'm not asking you to. I'm just asking for you to try! Try to get into the holiday spirit a little! You're not a child anymore, Richard… maybe you would like the holidays as an adult!"

He rolled his eyes… "Somehow I doubt that."

"I have a great idea!" Caroline announced suddenly, jumping from her seat and heading for their coats.

"Uh-oh. Why do I suddenly have the urge to run for my life?"

"Shut up!" she shot back humorously, handing him his coat…

He took his meager coat from her outstretched hand…"Where are we going?"

"It's a surprise! We're gonna do something… Christmas-y!"

"Am I still on the clock?"

"Yes! And you know Richard, you just might actually enjoy yourself!"

"Yeah, well… don't hold your breath."

*****~*****

--When they got to the ice skating rink,, RRichard immediately started to protest.

"Just cut it out!" Caroline snapped as she handed him his ice skates… "Put these on!"

"I don't know how to ice skate." he complained as he looked over the skates like they were foreign objects…

"Well, you're about to learn then!"

"There's no way I can talk you out of this?"

"Nope!"

"Fine." He sat down and started removing his shoes… "Since I'm on the clock, I can get 'workers comp' when I break my ankle, right?"

She chuckled… "Just shut up and put on your skates!"

*****

--Richard carefully stepped out onto the ice, immediately grabbing at Caroline for support as he slipped and slid about clumsily.

She helped him over to the side of the rink so he could hold onto the wall… "It takes a minute to get used to…"

He fought to stay upright… "Ugh… Caroline, I can't do this!"

"Yes you can Richard! Just try!"

--After a while, and with Caroline's help, Richard wasn't quite as wobbly… "See? You're getting it!" she chirped encouragingly…

"Yeah, well, I don't think I'm ready for the Olympics just yet."

She laughed at his sarcastic wit… "That's tomorrow's lesson." When Richard actually chuckled, a small smile following, she gasped dramatically… "Hey! Was that a laugh AND a smile!?"

"Maybe…" he smirked… "Don't get used to it."

She slapped him playfully, and when he tried to dodge it, he fell to the ice, dragging Caroline with him. At first they just laughed at their predicament, Caroline more than Richard… but then their eyes met and locked. For an instant, the world seemed to stand still, but all too quickly the moment was shattered…

"Hey, you guys alright?" a rink employee asked, breaking their trance…

"Uh, yeah…" Richard replied as he fought to get up off the ice…

Caroline quickly moved to help him… "Yeah, we're fine."

The employee smiled and started to skate away… "Ok then."

Once standing, the two just stood frozen, staring at each other… for what seemed like an eternity…

"Skate or leave the ice please." the employee said as he made his way back around…

"Sorry." Richard called out to him, then turned back to Caroline… "We should probably go."

"Yeah…" she nodded… "Ok."

*****~*****

--They didn't talk much on the way home,, tthey were both too deep in thought. Before they even realized it, they were back at Caroline's…

"You want some cookies?" she asked as she fumbled to get the door unlocked.

"Um… well, I was thinking… maybe I should get going…"

With it unlocked, she opened the door, then turned to face him… "Why?"

"Well, it's getting late. I don't think we'd get much done anyway… so…"

"Are you upset about something?"

"No, I'm not upset… just tired."

"Yeah, ice skating can take a lot out of you…"

"Falling on the ice repeatedly can, too." he added with a chuckle…

She smiled at his little joke… "Yeah…"

"Ok, so, we'll finish up tomorrow then…"

"Right."

There was an awkward air between them both could sense…

"Ok…" He turned to leave, but Caroline's voice stopped him…

"Richard?"

He faced her… "Yeah?"

"Did you have fun at all today?"

"Yeah. I guess."

She bowed her head dejectedly… "Ok."

He sighed when he saw the disappointment on her face… "Caroline, I had fun today…" he assured her…

She smiled, then her eyes glanced upwards. Richard followed her gaze to see what she was looking at. Mistletoe. They both looked at each other for a moment, then Caroline took a step towards him. Leaning in, lips barely touching, they kissed. Innocently, like between friends at first, but then it became passionate.

Both were oblivious when the elevator door opened and Annie stepped off into the hall…

"Ahem!" Annie announced her presence, which caused Richard to jump back away from Caroline. "Whatcha doin'?" she asked with a chuckle…

"Oh, um… well… mistletoe!" Caroline stammered, flustered… "We were kissing under the mistletoe! Is all…"

"I have to go." Richard interjected, pressing the button for the elevator… "I'll see you tomorrow Caroline."

"Sure you don't want to stay? Maybe… the night?" Annie teased.

He just glared at her… "Shouldn't you be saying that to a guy you just met?"

"Bite me Richard!"

He entered the elevator as soon as the door opened… "Not even if your life depended on it…"

"I'd rather die than have your lips on me!" Annie called out to the closed elevator doors.

"Um… Annie? He's gone…" Caroline chuckled at their banter…

"Doesn't make it any less true!"

*****

--"So… you gonna tell me what that was all about?" Annie asked as they entered Caroline's apartment…

"Nothing. It was nothing…" Caroline replied nonchalantly, dismissing her friend…

"Yeah, right Caroline. You two almost set off the smoke alarm!"

"Well, sorry, it was nothing. We were just kissing cause of the mistletoe and, it got a little…"

"Passionate?"

"Intense… was the word I was looking for…" Caroline corrected.

"Ok, ok… fine. Deny it." Annie said as she headed for the door.

"I'm not denying anything!" Caroline insisted… "There's nothing to deny!"

"I don't know what the big deal is! You guys obviously have feelings for each other! Why you won't admit it is beyond me!" Annie announced, then walked out the door, closing it behind her as she went.

Caroline stared at the door after Annie left. Her friend's words made her heart jump… but what did that mean? Did that mean there was some truth to what she had said?

*****~*****

--Richard couldn't sleep, he was too connsuumed by thoughts of the day's events. Without even giving it conscious thought, he had kissed Caroline passionately… with emotion he didn't even know he had… didn't even know he was capable of. He dreaded the morning. Caroline would certainly want to discuss the kiss…

*She likes to discuss everything… even her dryer lint.* he thought silently to himself.

He wondered what she would say. What should he say? His mind reeled with the idea of admitting his feelings for her. How else could he explain what had happened? He closed his eyes and fought to remember every detail of the kiss. Caroline returned the kiss, he was sure of that. He could feel it. But what did that mean? Did that mean she was falling in love with him? He couldn't allow himself to think that. If he were wrong, it would hurt too much. Eventually, he fell asleep.

*****

--Caroline was restless. She was tired enough to sleep, but she couldn't. The kiss under the mistletoe plagued her, and so did Annie's words. Did she have feelings for Richard that she couldn't admit to herself? Did he have feelings for her? She knew she cared for Richard, but was there more to it than that? And what about Richard? How could he be feeling anything for her? He usually acted as if he didn't even like her. She tried to think of anything… any moment that would indicate he had feelings for her, but she couldn't remember any. He was always so sarcastic, how could Annie think he had feelings for her? What was Annie seeing that she wasn't?

"There's no way I'm going to be able to sleep now..." Caroline said to herself as she got out of bed and put her robe on. "I have to see if Annie is up. I have to talk to her…"

*****

--She had to knock several times before Annnie finally answered the door…

"Hi. Sorry to wake you." Caroline apologized…

"That's ok…" Annie replied sleepily… "What's up?"

"I can't stop thinking… about what you said today. About me and Richard."

"Ok, what about it?"

"I just gotta know… how could you think Richard has feelings for me? I mean, this is the guy who charged me double-time for attending my birthday party!"

"Caroline, it's so obvious! He's always acting like he doesn't care about how you feel, always acting like he's better than you--"

"Don't you think that shows just the opposite? Those are the actions of someone who doesn't care!"

"Or the actions of someone who doesn't want you to know he cares…"

"Don't you think that's a bit of an assumption?"

"Caroline… I see the way he looks at you. He has it for you bad!"

"Ok, ok, ok… but, why did you say I have a thing for him?"

Annie laughed… "Cause you do!"

"Don't you think I'd know if I had feelings for someone?"

"Not if you're in denial."

Caroline started to respond, but Annie cut her off…

"Look, Caroline, it's late. Can we talk about this tomorrow?"

"Oh, yeah, sure. I'm sorry."

"It's ok sweetie…" Annie assured her friend with a hug… "We'll talk more tomorrow…"

*****~*****

--Richard stood outside Caroline's door,, ttoo nervous to go in. Even though he had spent most of the night thinking rather than sleeping, he still had no idea what he was going to say to her. Finally, after several minutes, he got the courage to go in and face her.

Caroline was in the kitchen toasting pop-tarts when Richard walked through the door…

"Mornin' Richard." She greeted him with a sort of hesitant cheeriness…

"Yes, it is. And in 3 hours it will be afternoon." He quipped as he hung up his coat…

"Aren't we a little ray of sunshine this morning!"

"Yeah, well… I didn't get much sleep."

"Me either." Caroline confessed.

They avoided eye contact as he walked to the desk and sat down. Caroline grabbed her pop-tarts and joined him at the desk, keeping in mind all that Annie had said… watching for any signs that would indicate he had feelings for her. After several minutes of silence she finally spoke up…

"Look, Richard, I think we should talk about what happened yesterday."

"I told you Caroline, I had a good time ice skating." he mumbled, stalling for time.

"Not that. I mean, we should talk about what happened… after that."

"What? When?"

She knew he was avoiding the subject… "Richard!"

"What?"

"You know what I'm talking about! Don't you think we should talk about it?"

"Ok, you want to talk about it?!" he asked with an exasperated tone, slamming the panel down on the drafting table… "Let's talk about it!" He got up and headed for his coat… "Ever since I started working here you have attempted to drag me into your little world. A world I have never seen. A world of happiness and optimism. And ever since I started working here I have fought your attempts… but you know what? I failed. And you won." He put his coat on and opened the door… "I've fallen in love with you. I didn't mean to, but I did." He couldn't bear to look at her, so with head hung low, he faced her… "So, now, if you'll excuse me… I'm just going to go throw myself in front of a bus." He turned to leave, but Caroline called after him…

"Richard! Wait!"

Hesitantly, he stopped and turned around… "What?" he asked softly, his eyes shut tight… his expression pained…

"Richard…" her voice was almost a whisper… "Look at me…"

Nervously, he opened his eyes and looked into Caroline's…

"Richard… why would you want to throw yourself in front of a bus?"

"Caroline… I… um… I just…" he stammered, not sure of what to say.

She sighed… "Did it ever occur to you that I just might feel the same?"

"You want to throw yourself in front of a bus?" he asked sarcastically…

She inched closer to him… "No…" She stopped right in front of him, then looked up… Richard followed suit… "Mistletoe." Her voice was almost inaudible…

"Deja Vu." He chuckled uneasily…

She put her hands on his shoulders and leaned into him, kissing him tenderly. Richard put his hands on her waist and returned the tender kiss, which quickly became very passionate.

"I have fallen in love with you too, Richard." Caroline murmured as she broke their kiss…

"Caroline…" Richard whispered breathlessly before she leaned in to kiss him again.

The kiss lasted several moments, though it felt like a wonderful eternity…

"So… what do we do now?" he asked apprehensively…

Caroline's smile was mischievous as she headed for the desk… "Well, I still have a deadline to meet. So, now, we get some work done. Later…" she smirked… "Well… we'll see."

Richard smiled in return… "Whatever you say… boss."